here are no Delta variant warnings in this column. You’re going to have to get your COVID news elsewhere going forward. But please be aware, bad grammar, questionable word usage and bad analogies are always a danger when reading Ponder the Thought. Proceed at your own risk. I am not responsible for injuries to you or your sense of what is right in the world.
This is my semi-annual random thoughts clearing column. Thoughts that weren’t deep enough for a complete column, but maybe just need a place to grow.
Not going to lie. I completely don’t understand the idiocy policy some places have implemented in the name of “health.” I bought a tea at Panera on Barry Road last week. I used the self-serve kiosk. I grabbed my cup and lid and filled my glass from the auto dispenser. I then looked for a straw. There were none. There was a small handwritten sign that said to “ask for a straw at counter.” So, I went to the counter that I had avoided by using the self serve kiosk and I had to wait in line to ask the young lady for a straw. She took out a rubber glove, put it on and then proceeded to grab a straw with the gloved hand and hand me the straw. I nearly laughed and cried myself to a non-COVID related death. What in the world are they thinking? I want to meet the idiot that sat in a meeting at Corporate Panera and went through this scenario. Then I want to meet the idiots that said it was a good idea before they left the meeting.
I promised you an underwear drawer column last week, but I didn’t get that drawer organized, so it will have to wait until another time. Sorry.
My dog likes to roll in coon poop, and I don’t understand this desire? My wife says it’s normal. I don’t think it is normal for anything to roll in any other things poop. Maybe I am just old fashioned.
My veterinarian’s wife told Foley she reads The Landmark in bed each week. If that is true, I’m hoping she can ask her husband why my dog keeps doing this and get back to me. I’m also wondering why they read The Landmark in bed, but whatever makes you happy makes me happy.
My dog goes to work with me each day, so rolling in coon poop is not an optimal way to start the day. When we jump in the truck and I smell coon poop, it’s a general meeting of the minds and requires an employee meeting, in which she tries to act like she didn’t roll in coon poop, but I prove to her that she did. She generally bathes herself, but it is a long process, so after we have our employee meeting, I have to clean her up before we can hit the road. This is slowing down productivity and in turn, slowing down the Biden Recovery plan. I’m thinking that a government stimulus check is the only solution to this issue. I’ll have to check with my vet to see if there are any programs out there. Maybe his wife could wake him up and ask him on this one too.
There is a chance that I might begin to write something more substantive next week, but I wouldn’t count on it. In the famous words of somebody’s grandma, “You get what you get, and you don’t throw a fit.”
(Guy Speckman can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or cleaning up coon poop)