Couple words of advice for your 4th of July social media posting. No one is interested in more than approximately three seconds of the fireworks display you are watching. Don’t be that guy.
Also, gather your people early before the “body crevice sweat” ruins your family photographs. You’re welcome.
For the first time in my life, I am attending a wedding on the 4th of July. I had almost lost faith in younger generations until I got the invitation for this wedding. Just genius by the groom that convinced the bride this was a promising idea. It’s in Parkville. You gotta think a wedding venue is pretty cheap on the 4th of July and then the finale of the evening is to step outside and watch the Parkville fireworks. Dude probably didn’t even buy sparklers to walk through.
This guy is a damn genius. He’ll never forget his anniversary date. He’ll always have something to do on that day other than some awkward romantic evening, and he’ll probably be married for 50 or 60 years. I remain awestruck at the pure simplicity of the choice.
My wife and I got married on Memorial Day weekend. I suspect there are still some random people mad at me for messing up their weekend. We were young and had no idea that the entire world wasn’t interested in being at our wedding. Live and learn. I had no idea how adult me would have rage anger at anyone that tried to commandeer my holiday weekends like that.
My daughter gets married in August. I’m not sure about all of the details. I’m on an “as necessary” notice for details. She’s wired a little tight like a young version of me, so I’m assuming she has this all under control. My plan is to wear what I’m told to wear and not be late. I’m afraid of my daughter, but really afraid of my daughter and wife when they are on the same team. Pray for me.
Don’t tell Donald but I’m not feeling the 250th birthday of this country like we did the 200th. I was a kid, but I remember what a big deal that was in this country. We had signs and memorabilia and all types of things going on for the Bicentennial in 1976. We partied in the streets of Plattsburg. The internet tells me that 250 million people took part in 66,000 local events back then.
I don’t see that happening this weekend. The only fact that can be drawn from all of this is that Gerald and Betty Ford throw a better party than Donald and Melania. Facts are facts. We all knew that Betty could party in her day, but I had no idea that Gerald could “cut a proverbial rug” with 66 million people. Good for them.
As a sidenote, Betty got sober in April of 1978, so that probably slowed down the party scene for the Fords, but they’ll always have ’76.
(Guy Speckman can be reached celebrating America’s birthday by drinking free wedding beers on the 4th of July)
