ew York Governor Andrew Cuomo says, “if you can make a baby in nine months, you can redesign a police department.”
We’ve all gone insane. Pack your stuff, we need to let some other species run this planet.
I guess once Governor Cuomo got all the ventilators he needed, he needed something else to say, so this is what we were blessed with. I am not sure how the time frame for having a baby equates to reorganizing a police department, but I am sure it is all just “science” that you and I don’t understand. Probably need Dr. Fauci to explain.
I do not know about Governor Cuomo, but my experience tells me Bud Light is part of the baby equation making science, but we will have to wait until the government hosts a press conference to confirm. Hopefully, they will do a nice chart and such for us commoners.
Remember when our biggest concerns were Ned Yost decisions? Those were the days.
I told you a couple of weeks ago that local real estate was still on fire, despite a global pandemic. Get a load of the newest trend. Beyond the fact that buyers are often having to bid significantly higher than list price to garner the house of their liking, many have taken to writing personal letters to the sellers to sway the sale their way.
Talked to two Platte County residents and one Clay County couple that sold their homes in the last few months. All three got personal plea notes from the buyers in competing offer sales. Basically, the notes go something like this, “Dear seller. This is our little family’s dream home and we want to pay you a lot of money for it and also beg you to sell it to us. Here is a picture of our cute family and we plan to buy this house and live happily ever after and will probably name a tree out back in your honor. We will take lots of Instagram photos and drink craft beer on the patio.”
That is not the exact wording, but it is true. Buyers are literally begging sellers to sell to them. I am not sure how to explain all this. Industry professionals will say that it is low inventory, but this is a step beyond that. It might be another sign that we have overstayed our welcome on earth; either way, write a pretty note the next time you pony up some cash for a house or you are not getting it.
On the flip side. If your self-esteem is on the low side, call a realtor and put your house on the market. Price it low and see how many complimentary notes you can get with the offers. Presto, you sold your house and boosted your confidence. You’re welcome.
A bit of final good news. There is talk of a Dolly Parton statue at the Tennessee capitol. Apparently one of the statues is of a former Confederate General that did have quite a sordid history. Without revisiting General Nathan Bedford Forrest’s history, I for one am all for a Dolly Parton statue; I’m just worried about how easy it would be to topple if we ever have a revolt or a change in feelings for large busted women.
I assume we can leave that to future generations to worry about. You only live once. I say, build it.
(Guy Speckman can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or planning a trip to the Tennessee Capitol)