Nutrition experts, hot dogs and Vicki Lawrence

I‘ve always thought Kale works better as a name than it does as a food option.


The nutrition experts are telling us that eating a hot dog cuts 36 minutes off your life but I’m calling BS. If that were true Joey Chestnut would have been dead years ago.


Besides, do not try to talk me into giving up grilled hot dogs. Not happening. Grilling hot dogs is a patio tradition for me, and it’s one of just a few menu options I can create with no help from people with better culinary skills.

I do not cook indoors. Never even attempt it. Well, other than a frozen pizza. So I’ll continue to cut hours off my life with hot dogs topped with mustard, ketchup and relish. The end.


Speaking of hot dogs, here’s an update on the food shortage at schools, a topic featured on our front page last week. Park Hill School District officials say the district’s primary food distributor, Kohl’s, notified the district that it is canceling its contract with Park Hill immediately. Kohl’s also canceled the contracts for every other school district they work with in the region.

“Because our community and our board of education supported our need to build a district warehouse, we can stockpile some foods, if we can get them,” the district said in an email. “Our students and families might notice that we are offering less (the correct word usage here would be “fewer,” not “less,” but you get the picture) options, that our menus might change after we post them, and that we can’t get certain foods, like cereal.”


So there’s a problem getting cereal now? Look, I’ve been patient with this COVID supply chain aggravation and whatnot, but if it starts messing with my stock of Crunch Berries stuff is gonna hit the fan.


I’m old enough to remember when the school lunch ladies referred to hot dogs as pigs in a blanket.


Hope you’ll join us for a couple of upcoming episodes of Landmark Live, our videocast you can find on our Facebook page at Platte County Landmark:

Thursday, Sept. 16: Season 5 of Landmark Live debuts at 6 p.m. with Landmark columnist Guy Speckman joining me in studio for a discussion on a variety of topics. Speckman is a former newspaper publisher, former city administrator, professional smartass, retired bar fighter and longtime Bud Light aficionado. To make Speckman feel at home, this episode will be like two guys talking in a pub. Speckman has thoughts on the Platte County Commission’s plan to spend $20 million in COVID money on building improvements, and as a former city administrator he’ll have insightful commentary on other local government happenings in our area. We’ll also talk football, of course, and Speck gets the honor of interviewing our first weekly winner of Landmark Pickem, who will give you some tremendous insight on his keys to winning.

Thursday, Sept. 23: At 6 p.m., Emmy Award-winning comedienne Vicki Lawrence of The Carol Burnett Show fame, as well as later television fame as her ‘Mama’ character that she had developed on the Burnett show, will join Landmark Live via Zoom for what promises to be an unpredictable time.

We’ll ask her, among other things, about this: Legend has it Lawrence, as a high school senior, sealed her fate for fame by sending Carol Burnett a newspaper clipping showing their uncanny resemblance to each other, and asking if Burnett could give some advice for a contest she was in called “Miss Fireball” in California. Burnett supposedly found Vicki’s phone number and called her. Burnett attended the “Miss Fireball” event, hoping to find an entertainer who could play her kid sister on her variety show. Vicki Lawrence spent 11 years with the show, earning one Emmy Award and five more nominations.

Vicki Lawrence will be in Kansas City next month, performing at Ameristar Casino and Hotel in: “Vicki Lawrence & Mama: A Two Woman Show.”


Discussions to get Vicki Lawrence on Landmark Live began last month when an out-of-the-blue text message from her representative, notable longtime Hollywood agent Sandy Brokaw, lit up my cell phone. Sandy began his career as a teen working in the mail room of the William Morris Agency. In his mid-20s, he set out to make his own mark in the industry, and in 1976 Sandy and his brothers formed The Brokaw Company in Los Angeles, an entertainment firm specializing in public relations and personal management.

His initial text came in on a Friday evening while Mrs. Between the Lines and I were waiting for a table at a Northland restaurant, and a series of messages were exchanged throughout the evening, something I’m not sure my date appreciated.

Sandy Brokaw, by the way, is the agent who got Garth Brooks his first network special. Other notable clients of Brokaw have included Bill Cosby, Andy Griffith, Glen Campbell, Tony Orlando, Lou Rawls, Mary Hart, Reba McEntire, Aretha Franklin, the Oak Ridge Boys, Toby Keith, and many others.

(Find Ivan Foley at ivan@plattecountylandmark.com or consuming modern day pigs in a blanket)

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