Foley put his “foot” down this week and said no more toe columns. “Get it together Speckman or find a new outlet,” was what I heard. The “little piggie” run has ended; an unceremonious death at the “feet” of an exasperated publisher.
Foley’s getting kind of grumpy in his old age. I suspect his feet hurt or something. He just doesn’t understand the joys of having an office within “feet” of a state prison sized county jail or the intricacies involved in writing about toes each and every single week. Age is undefeated, folks.
Give him space, he’s earned it.
Are we winning the war in Ukraine? It’s hard for me to tell. Seems like the New York Times could do a War Tracker or something, kind of like the COVID tracker they used to have. War has turned into a youth rec league contest where no one is allowed to keep score. You’d think with all the death and money and stuff, we’d at least be able to keep score. Probably take all our fingers and toes, but I can’t go there.
Without telling me the problems with the Republican candidates for president, can anyone defend the cognitive failures of the current president? This guy is not with us. He’s not.
I’m kind of intrigued by Robert Kennedy Jr.’s candidacy. This guy is bucking his own party and he’s saying things about both parties that many people have felt for a decade plus. It would be so 2024 for a Kennedy to win a nomination as the “outsider” candidate. We are living in some crazy times.
Speaking of the Kennedys, President Kennedy had custom designed slide sandals with JFK emblazoned over his foot and “exposed toes,” that’s not something you learn every day.
I exaggerated last week when I said the Missouri Legislature didn’t get anything done. Apparently, they passed a law so that you can now take a class on the Bible in public schools. Thank God we got that done, literally. Doesn’t Mid-Continent have the Bible at one of their 55 locations in the two-county area? Probably in the culinary kitchen section, but check the Dewey Decimal system before you go.
If this is meaningful legislation to you, I’m sorry to break this to you but I peeked at the end, “The Devil Did it.” There I ruined it but saved you from making your kid take the class.
Just in case you get asked about it or meet a special girl with the condition, a “Devils Foot” is defined as a foot divided by a cleft, as in the ox, deer, and sheep. used as a symbol of the devil, who is usually pictured with such hoofs.
I suppose those are hard to run on.
Honestly, I want to meet the 16-year-old that looks at a list of electives and says, yep, The Bible, that’s the class I want. Business? Nope. Health? Nope, Computers? Nope, “I just want a heap of religion to round out my day.” I’ve never known anyone that didn’t first attempt to take an independent study hall as an elective of first choice, but maybe I run in different circles than you, we can all be different.
Anyway, as long as you got 10 toes or at least some devils hooves, you can march yourself to any class you like now thanks to the Missouri Legislature. Not all heroes wear capes.
(Guy Speckman can be reached at a Robert Kennedy campaign rally)
