• About Us
  • Advertise
  • Contact Us
  • Privacy Policy
  • Pickem Terms and Conditions
Tuesday, May 24, 2022
The Platte County Landmark Newspaper
  • Home
  • Local News
  • Opinion
  • Landmark Pickem!
    • Login / Sign-up
    • Results by Week
    • Pickem Rules and Help
  • Landmark Live!
  • Looking Backward
  • es_MXSpanish
  • Home
  • Local News
  • Opinion
  • Landmark Pickem!
    • Login / Sign-up
    • Results by Week
    • Pickem Rules and Help
  • Landmark Live!
  • Looking Backward
  • es_MXSpanish
No Result
View All Result
The Platte County Landmark Newspaper
No Result
View All Result

Death boxes, legislative fantasy lists

Guy Speckman by Guy Speckman
January 21, 2022
in Ponder the Thought
Death boxes
7
SHARES
174
VIEWS
Share on FacebookShare on TwitterShare via Email

New year, new me. That’s not true at all. If you didn’t like this column in 2021, I doubt you like 2022, but keep reading. I keep better track of my detractors than supporters. In 2021 I had a guy tell me to smoke a muffler, wished me dead in a compost pile and accused me of throwing out uninformed patriotic driven opinions. I’ll wear the uninformed opinion label. As far as veiled death threats, I’d like to come to an agreement to skip those this year. Let’s smell the roses, six feet apart.


The wife and I have been cleaning out our basement. Like many families, my family tree went from being a rather strong little sapling growing up in a normal Midwestern climate, to a lightning ravaged, weathered tree that you might accidentally cut down if not for the fact it hides another few ugly trees. Anyway, that meant lots of less than upward growing branches on the family tree that made it a little bushier and hanging a little closer to the ground. Think Weeping Willows. If you have big plans for your death, don’t read this next part.

RelatedNews

Get in your lane, government Big Macs

Budget, wars and tweets

Jesse James, Mother’s Day

Basically, I have surmised from this basement cleaning that your material life is reduced to a final small box of things in the end. Mostly its cards and notes and a nice little sign-in book that the funeral home gives you, or more aptly gives to the last person out the door of your funeral. Most of the books even include a recent picture of you before you died, which is certainly preferable to one after you die.

I mean, it’s nice and all, but kind of sad to cram 70-80 or 100 years into a small box. As some odd sort of irony, I became the most stable and proximate child of these families that became our family tree and ended up with eight “death boxes.” Eight! My nephew who died in his 30s had the same size box as my stepfather, who was almost 90. Let that sink in.

Anyway, the moral to the story is that our legacies, beyond the memories of your family and friends are generally whittled down to these “death boxes” and yours may end up among many in the basement of some unknown descendant/relative, live your life accordingly.


One of the boxes that I ended up with is a step-great aunt. I met her like once. If not for me having her ashes, I would have guessed she’d be rolling over in her grave at the thought of me caring for her memory.


Just for the record. The only way to properly dispose of family heirlooms is a dumpster. Get a few beers in you and let it rip. It’s the only respectful way to treat these items. Wouldn’t want some family member to find them at a thrift store and have to buy them back. That would be awkward.


I don’t have a good segue from death boxes to politics, so lets just rip the band aid off and move on.

Platte County’s Missouri Senator Tony Luetkemeyer has put his name on several bills for the upcoming legislative session and it’s like a Republican fantasy list. Young Republicans in navy blue blazers and red ties just sit around eating Angus steak, drinking Michelob Ultras and read this list and drool. He’s fighting for the Kansas City police department to get more budget dollars. He’s behind a sports gambling bill for Missouri, exempting disabled vets from property taxes, limiting growth on assessments for property taxes, provisions relating to elections, tougher penalties for offenses relating to police dogs and a few other bills that would make Alex Keaton and Ronald Reagan proud. Anyway, I like it. I’m not sure the local Democratic caucus will be thrilled, but as President Obama once said, elections have consequences.

(Guy Speckman can be reached at gspeckman@me.com or offering to store your death box)

Tags: electionsplatte countyPublic Safetytaxes
Guy Speckman

Guy Speckman

Guy Speckman is a Landmark contributing columnist with his Ponder the Thought column. Speckman is the former owner of the Savannah Reporter, where the column appeared for nearly two decades. Speckman is a former city government manager, serving as city administrator in Maysville, Plattsburg and Savannah before entering business. He is a graduate of Northwest Missouri State University (1989). He is originally from Plattsburg, Missouri. He and his wife own and operate a real estate valuation firm and a daily legal newspaper and are the parents of two grown children.

Related Posts

Chloe Bramble

Landmark English Award

by Landmark Staff
May 23, 2022
0

Chloe Bramble, a graduating senior at Platte County High School, is this year's winner of The Landmark English Award. The award, established by the newspaper in 1982, is given each year to a Platte County High School senior as a...

45 Years Ago–May 20, 1977

by Ivan Foley
May 20, 2022
0

Mr. and Mrs. Mike Latham of Kansas City announce the birth of their son, Brian Nelson, on May 12, 1977. The maternal grandparents are Mr. and Mrs. Russell Quinn of Camden Point and the paternal grandparents are Mr. and Mrs....

Get in your lane, government Big Macs

Get in your lane, government Big Macs

by Guy Speckman
May 20, 2022
0

I listened to an interview with the United States Secretary of Transportation Pete Buttigieg this week. I nearly wanted to cry at the lack of common sense approach of such a high-ranking government official. He was answering questions about the...

30 Years Ago–May 22, 1992

by Ivan Foley
May 20, 2022
0

In a closed session Thursday, the Platte City Board of Aldermen voted to fire Tim Ryan, city administrator. Pearl Brown, the new mayor, declined to comment as to why Ryan was fired, and explained that "it is the policy of...

Next Post
Gas prices

Local gas price indicators are interesting

Popular News

  • FBI Kansas City Field Office

    FBI headed to Platte County

    284 shares
    Share 114 Tweet 71
  • Multiple PCHS students taken to hospital

    106 shares
    Share 42 Tweet 27
  • Effort alive to build new Northland Career Center

    54 shares
    Share 22 Tweet 14
  • Local gas pricing pattern should be investigated

    53 shares
    Share 21 Tweet 13
  • Weatherby Lake man sentenced in fraud scheme

    17 shares
    Share 7 Tweet 4
  • About Us
  • Advertise
  • Contact Us
  • Privacy Policy
  • Pickem Terms and Conditions
Call us at 816-858-0363

Copyright © 2019-2020 The Platte County Landmark Newspaper - All Rights Reserved

No Result
View All Result
  • Subscribe Online
  • Home
  • Local News
  • Opinion
  • Landmark Pickem
    • Results by Week
    • Pickem Rules and Help
  • Landmark Live!
  • Looking Backward
  • es_MXSpanish

Copyright © 2019-2020 The Platte County Landmark Newspaper - All Rights Reserved

Are you sure want to unlock this post?
Unlock left : 0
Are you sure want to cancel subscription?