vander Holyfield fought in a “professional” boxing event last week. Just when you think it is 1995 again, it’s not. Evander was born in 1962, which makes him 58-years-old in human years. Evander lost to a “spring chicken,” 49-year-old UFC fighter by TKO in the first round. Evander took to the canvas twice before the referee called it a night and sent him back to his recliner.
For the record, common sense tells me that 58-year-old humans should not be boxing anywhere beyond a workout gym where other people are not trying to hit you. Unfortunately, it appears financial greed overrode common sense for Evander.
One state licensing agency had taken Holyfield’s boxing license for the stated reasons of “poor fighting and diminished skills.” That was ELEVEN years ago.
Just a quick question, do presidents have to have licenses?
I can honestly relate to Evander. I feel like I have poor fighting and diminished skills at this point as well. Certainly, it can be seen in my writing in this newspaper. I’m trying not to ever fight again. I wasn’t very good at it when I was younger, so I can only imagine bad outcomes if the mood ever struck me again.
Speaking of diminished skills and fighting, President Biden appears poised to fight the legacy of Jimmy Carter for the worst presidency in history. The problem Sleepy Joe has is that he doesn’t have a few decades post White House to clean up his legacy and corresponding image. Carter has done all kinds of good deeds in his post White House stint to erase the sweater wearing, thermostat turning down presidency he presided over. Unfortunately, Joe don’t have that kind of time.
Is it awkward for me to proclaim my love for Andy Reid and Patrick Mahomes in this space?
Platte County officials have announced that they are going to spend $20 million dollars of COVID funds to make capital investments and operational changes to mitigate the effects of the pandemic. The money is from a federal grant and is part of your money the federal government has printed and dropped on our heads from the sky. It’s money that your great grandchildren will be paying interest on.
Anyway, the press release made me chuckle. The commissioners talked about how COVID has changed the way business is done and people don’t need to come to the courthouse to conduct business and then went on to say they were going to fire up an architectural review committee and work on these new building plans that “could delay the need to add government office space for years to come.”
Wait. What? This was the ultimate government double speak. Really impressive to be honest. They’re going to build stuff now to maybe delay the need to build stuff in the future.
Let me put it in real people words. Here is what they said. “We’re pretty thrilled the public isn’t going to come in our offices and bother us anymore. We’re going to take this buttload of extra cash and build some more offices and fancy water fountains with extra Plexiglas that the public will never see as a result of this “transformational” change. Thank you and please pay your taxes on time, if you need us, we’ll be picking out carpet at Nebraska Furniture Mart.”
(Guy Speckman can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org or fighting a lifetime battle of diminished skills)