I can tell you I now understand what true writer’s block is. I’ve heard of it but until now I hadn’t truly experienced it.
I’ve written books and songs and poems and other things that will never see the light of day. Those were all written when I had an idea – when the muse was knocking on my front door, hard. Writing has always come easy to me because I only did it when I felt like it. It was never my job, until now.
(Admittedly, my salary from The Landmark is barely enough to motivate me OR the muse, so expect some subpar columns.)
But the muse is something that author Steven Pressfield claims is always there. It doesn’t simply appear when it has something to give me. My only job is to submit to it.
The idea of a mysterious force that cannot be seen or heard is nothing new. Pressfield even recites a prayer to his muse every morning, taken from a section of Homer’s Odyssey. Yes, I know. It kind of sounds like “God.” Bear with me.
I’ve been asked many times by readers: “How do you come up with your stories?”
I’d shrug. “I don’t know. I just think of them.”
But it’s clear to me nowadays that my creations are given to me. The muse leads, I follow.
The muse has an adversary, though: the voice of resistance. Every person on Earth has a voice of resistance, even the non-creative folks.
You suck at songwriting.
You don’t feel like going to soccer training. You should try to get out of it.
Why even bother writing a column? No one cares.
We’ve all got that voice in our heads. Unfortunately too many of us listen to that voice, like it’s our agent or confidant. Some people live their lives via the voice of resistance, and that’s not good.
As I’ve gotten older and learned more and more about me, my brain, and the people around me, I’ve realized one important thing that is absolutely one hundred percent true that most people do not recognize:
YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS.
Those voices in our head are thoughts and they are not generated by your heart or your being. Our brain is a computer filled with more data than we can possibly imagine. Thoughts are really more of a processing agent. Think of them as a web page loading. Once completed, you’ve got all the data right in front of you.
This is why the first thing that pops into your head often needs to stay inside your noggin. It’s only a small part of the processing.
Think before you act or speak. Let the web page load before you start clicking around on it.
It’s not an easy thing to do. We often find ourselves speaking while we are thinking things out. This is how we end up saying things we regret. Once it rolls off your tongue, you can’t put it back in your head where it was hidden.
We all need to slow things down a bit. A conversation is not a competition. It’s okay to pause before you speak.
Or tweet.
Politicians and others in the spotlight are learning this the hard way. Once you post it, you can’t take it back. Use that brain. It’s why you have it.
But back to writing.
So…is the muse God and is the voice of resistance the devil?
To each their own, I suppose. Though I still think you can be an atheist and believe in a muse. It’s best to not think of this as religion.
The muse is always there waiting to use me as a vessel. If I don’t have a way to write down what the muse is throwing at me, I’m screwed. That’s why my phone is so valuable. I’m actually writing this paragraph from my phone…in the bathroom.
Sometimes the first draft doesn’t work. The translation from muse to brain to paper was “off.” Thankfully, I’m a good editor.
The muse is a mystifying and incomprehensible energy that I swear is real. It’s just that the voice of resistance is also real. Right now it’s telling me that this column is brutal. The muse is telling me it’s good. They are both telling me to stop. I guess for once I’ll adhere to both of them at the same time.
(Reach Landmark columnist Brad Carl via email to bradjcarl@gmail.com)
