by C.K. Rairden
As the Chiefs/Giants game unfolded, I began
to believe that I was going to run out of pages in my
legal pad, as I jotted down memo after memo for the KC
Chiefs and the fans. I whittled it down to the top 15.
Dont think I forgot the rest of the league, weve
got plenty of suggestions for them as well.
A long list for the Kansas City Chiefs-
-The offense you are attempting to run will not work
without offensive playmakers on the outside. Make some
-If Todd Peterson is the answer, whats the question?Check
thatthat was from last week.
-If Todd Peterson cant hit a 52-yard FG attempt
with a stiff wind at his back, he cant hit a 49-yard
attempt into that stiff wind.
-Todd Peterson apparently has a range of 37 yards, meaning
the Chiefs actually have to penetrate the opponents 20
to have an opportunity for 3 points. Thats not good
-Stop being so stubborn, find Derrick Mayes phone
number and use it.
-Stop being so stubborn, bring in some kickers now.
To Chiefs QB Trent Green-
-Until this offense finds some playmakers, points will
be at a premium, dont force anything from the five-yard
line. You were actually in Petersons range.
-Get used to the boos from the Arrowhead fans, they expect
this to be turned around yesterday.
-When you run down the middle of the field, learn to
To Chiefs defensive coordinator Greg Robinson-
-Youve earned your pay for the second straight
game. Alsonice half time adjustments
To Chiefs offensive coordinator Al Saunders-
To Chiefs fans-
-Learn to say the word transition.
-If you had visions of playoffs forget it. This is a
-Its going to take more than two games to turn
around a program that was in serious decline. This is
a transition year.
-In case you need it, this is from Websterstransition
(noun): passage from one state, stage, subject, or place
To the NFL-
-The 2001 Colts may be the '99 Rams. Their offense is
unstoppable so far.
-The Dolphins defense is very good. No defensive TDs
to the Raiders.
-The Chargers have a legitimate shot at a 5-0 start.
They are now 2-0 with Cincinnati, Cleveland and New England
-The winner of the Chargers-Bengals game next week will
be (gulp) 3-0.
-The Rams are now 2-0 and could just as easily be 0-2.
Both were on the road. They are dangerous.
To the Baltimore Ravens-
-That is the kind of play that you can expect from Elvis
Grbac from time to time. But remember its not his
fault. Just ask him.
To the union refs-
-You blew a bunch of calls around the league today, do
we now discuss bringing the replacement refs back?
-When you blow a call and go to the replay booth and
look at itviews actually know that you blew it.
Reverse the call when necessary.
To the FOX broadcast team at KC-
-Great shot of the punch drunk Snoop Minnis after his
-Bill MaasOne John Madden is enough.
To the American people-
-Never ever take your freedoms for grantedthey
have been paid for with the ultimate price many times
before and it will continue as long as America expects
to remain free.